Wednesday, December 14, 2011

I'll Be Home For Christmas...

I grew up in a military family.  I wasn't a military brat, but was surrounded by grandparents, uncles, and cousins who chose to serve our Country.  My Nana wasn't fond of Christmas, and she absolutely HATED the song "I'll Be Home for Christmas".  I can only remember one Christmas growing up when she got to have all her kids together for the holiday.  I didn't really understand back then...but I do now.

It's been five years now since I left home.  I left a few days before Christmas, and it was really hard on the family to not have us there.  We've made do.  We've since then added another child to our family, started our own Christmas traditions and have just been living life.  However, every time "I'll Be Home for Christmas" plays, I fall into a heap of sobs.  I have hated that song so much.  With The Hubs' work schedule, and always PCSing across the country right near Christmas, and money being tight, we just haven't had the chance to go home for Christmas. 

The Hubs hasn't been home for Christmas since he joined the military.  I haven't been home to OK this time of year in 5 years.  KK has never spent the holidays with anyone but us.  We haven't been to OK at all in 2 years.  Today I hear the song.  The song that has been my archnemesis this time of year for 5 years on...

But this year I'm not crying.  This year I'm packing up the van.  This year...this year

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